A CHILD BARGAINING FOR HAPPINESS

Oh I wish that clock would move.

Will 2.30 ever come? I have to stop worrying, because today everything is going to be OK. She said it would be!

She said, "Today we'll visit Uncle Jim, hurry home from school and we'll get the three o'clock bus. Don't worry, everthing will be alright today."

I hope so. Oh, I really hope so! Hurry clock, hurry. The sooner I get there, the sooner I'll know.... "So long, kids. See you tomorrow". "Can't you walk with us today?." "No, I've got to get home fast. My mother and I are going out."

Oh, my stomach hurts. I wish I wasn't so nervous. Maybe if I stop running it will help. Besides, what's a few minutes? It's a lot though! It could mean a lot. The sooner I get there the sooner I'll know.

Please God, make it be alright today. Just this once make it be OK. Please - I'll be good. I'll try harder in school. If you will make it OK today, I'll get a good mark on my test. Please God, I'll be great, I really will.

Ouch, my side hurts from running. I've got to slow down. I'll know in a few minutes anyhow. If I don't step on sidewalk cracks everything will be

OK, Step on a crack, break your mother's back. Maybe if I walk on the left side of the street it will help. If I step over every crack with my left foot, and I walk on the left side, everything will be OK today.

Hey God, do You hear me? I'm begging You. I'm really going to try. I'll be good, I promise. I won't lose my temper any more.

"Please, Please, hear me!" Please let it be OK. Just this once let me be proud. Let me tell them I went with my Mom and we had a great time. I'll hold my books in my right hand, that's closer to my heart. No. That's not enough.

I'll keep my hand on my heart and then God will see I'm really trying. I'm so ashamed! Why can't I be like the other kids? Why can"t I go home and smell some food cooking and find Mom smiling, and she would say "Did you have a nice day, dear?

Boy, do I hate that expression she gets on her face. That dumb, stupid expression. I hate it! And I hate her when she is like that! But today I'll love her. Today will be different. A little more and I'll be there. Please God, we made a deal! Please today, let her be a real Mom. Let me look and see that everything is OK. I promise I'll be good. I'll do everything.

Please...just once! She's not at the door. "Hey mom", "Mom" "Hey Mom I'm home. You ready?"

"God, you promised me. You said it would be ok today!" It's too quiet. She's not answering. Now I hear her, she is getting up.

"Oh no Mom, get up, get up, Mom you promised". YOU PROMISED ME YOU WOULDN'T DRINK ANYTHING TODAY. YOU PROMISED, MOM! GOD PROMISED.

Mom answered; "Tomorrow, we'll go tomorrow, and I promise I won't drinking anything tomorrow. You come home from school tomorrow and we'll get the bus. Tomorrow will be different!

DON says: A very poignant story! Unfortunately this goes on a lot more than we know, all over the world.