I HEAR THE BIRDS NOW!!!

When I left the Donwood, I was shaky, raw and full of fear. I knew that this was my last chance at a proper life. I was on the brink, one more drink and I would sink into the morass of alcoholism, a complete loss of will, and a complete inability to cope with life without alcohol..
It was during this time that I attended an AA meeting in downtown Toronto at a place I cannot even remember now, except that it was a dingy church hall. There was at least 100 men there, of all shapes and sizes, all bound by that tragic brotherhood of the alcoholic. Coffee and cigarettes were the only stimulants there. There were young and old, poor and prosperous. We were all bound by the same affliction, the inability to cope with life without alcohol.

A little old man got up to speak. He was grizzly, needed a shave, and one could see the cigarette shaking in his old hands. He told us how he had been around the city for years, living on the streets, doing small jobs to support his habits.

In a quivering voice he told of a miracle that he had experienced that very morning! He had the birds! He related that during the former years he had never heard the birds in the mornings. They were a beautiful sound that he reveled in. It reminded him of his youth when he was married and had children and a decent job. But with his abuse of alcohol, he began to lose everything, wife, children, home, and even the little things in life such as hearing the birds.

He had a radiance in his face that came through the leathery skin of his old body. It was not too late! He had heard the birds!

With a shock I suddenly realized that I had not heard the birds for years, and suddenly after a few months of sobriety I awoke one morning to hear them.

It is a phenomina that in the throes of drinking one blocks out all outward signs of living. The love of family, the feeling of accomplishment at the job, the noise of children, the beauty of a sunrise. There are many other wonderful things in life to enjoy, but it must be done without alcohol because it take over your life and dominates your thinking.

My fear of alcohol fueled my determination that I would beat it, and I did. I just passed my 39th anniversary of quitting drinking. Am I proud of myself? You bet! I love life, at at 75 years of age I am bound to go to the end sober.

AND I HEAR THE BIRDS EVERY DAY!