FEELINGS OF GUILT

BY DR. GEORGE BIRTCH

There have been several people recently who have expressed feeling of guilt over things done in the past that can never be undone. The guilt weight so heavily that they are handicapped in handling the present and anxious regarding the future.

It is one thing to feel guilty about some form of behaviour in the present that is unacceptable to you at your best. That is normal, in the same sense that having a fever is the normal result of infection. The fever is the signal of the infection. It is the warning bell. You go to the doctor and he attacks the infection, knowing that if that is dealt with the fever will look after itself.

In the same sense guilt is useful in sending up a signal that draws attention to a trouble spot. Guilt about behaviour that is over and done with is something else again. It has no positive value, unless there is still that which can be done to make restitution.

It is natural to feel remorse for something in the past that has caused hurt or has been destructive. But to dwell on it and re-live it and brood over it is futile. It saps the power to make best use of the present.

The only time life can be lived is in the present. We can learn from experience, even experience of failure. But then we have to master the art of leaving the past behind. This not just self-hypnotism. It is an act of faith in the universe. It is believing that the forces on the side of life are stronger than the powers that destroy. If that were not so the world would have gone down the drain long ago. Tune in to Life, or Health, or whatever power that leads to positive and hopeful living. You can trust life to weave the past into the mosaic of the present and the future.

Don says: Been there, done that! I have wasted a lot of my time by rehashing old, stupid things I have done. They are there, we can not change that, but we can control our emotions, and go on with life, learning from our experiences.

An old chinese way of handling bad present and past memories is to envision in your mind a box, much like a safety deposit box at the bank, key and all. Mentally take the memory and put it in the box, lock it up. Leave it there, and try not to think of what you are concealing. It works for me!